While battling various personal demons lately, increased stress, and lack of sleep, i have made a couple observations.
One it doesn’t matter how positive an experience or event is likely to cause frustration, or increased stress. For example: i received word that i got an internship at a recording studio in Chicago; incredible right, i felt so at first, but then even that excitement just stressed me out amidst various shooting a few photo sessions, mixing Moore Media Records CD sampler tracks, and normal school work, plus small attempts at keeping a social life.
Some of the things i felt, or have taken seriously have ended up nothing more than a game. Everything in life at this point seems like a game.
I’m completely oblivious when it comes to women, and most things in general.
That being close to people in times of frustration and stress is irreplaceable.
Recent experiences have left me humble to say the least, while at the same time realizing my need to revitalize my confidence in the person i am.
That my college education with respect to just the institution is pointless (still arguing this in my head)
Realization that i am just as scared as everyone else (about future, impending doom feelings, and fear the effect of myself on myself and others).
That i have been lucky to not have to work at personal relationships in the past, but that i have to really fight to maintain the ones i have now, or while making new ones.
Life is good even in the dull, scary, or stressful moments, and watchout cause theres awesome surprises lurking everywhere such as new friends, people who come through for me at the darndest time, an internsip, and an appreciation for my photo work, and shit tons more
Life is nuts, im nuts, were all nuts, and i like honey roasted Planters peanuts.
The last few weeks have been some of the craziest in my life, and for those who are with me and have been with me through this and other trips I Love You.